Sunday, May 10, 2015

The Finale

Hey, this is my final post ever.  I know everyone must be crushed (sarcasm intended).  This is a reflection over my 20x project over the past school year.  Overall I'd have to say this was a great experience.  No, I'm not just saying this to kiss up; I genuinely liked this project.  At the beginning of the year this project seemed like the bane of my existence.  But now, as it comes to a close, I see it as a wonderful part of the past year.

Don't get me wrong, there were some things I would've like to have done differently.  I think that a blog post every week would be better than alternating every other week.  It would have forced me to work at a faster pace, so that I would have more to talk about sooner.  I wish that more people had commented on my blog. I know it sounds a bit narcissistic, but it would be nice to know if I'm writing these blog posts to someone, that someone other than me cares about this project.  I barely got any feed back and it frustrated me a little.  After realizing that this was bothering me, I noticed I was a hypocrite, while complaining about not getting comments, I myself didn't comment on other people's blogs.  If I were to re-do my experience with the project I would try to invest myself with other's projects, to be more involved outside of my own work.  It would be nice if one Friday was designated every month for looking at everyone else's projects.

Despite what I mentioned above, the good of this project outweighed the bad.  Once I had chosen poetry as my project, I knew what I was going to do.  This forced me to learn about myself, what I think and feel.  I was shocked to find out how much little things like music affected my emotions.  By pressing my emotions on paper I've become better at expressing them out loud.  I've been forced to face some flaws in my character and have started to work to address them.  This project gave me a creative outlet, which I needed with my heavy academic work load.  When I felt like nothing was going right and nothing would get better, I had my poetry to siphon off all of the negativity, making me feel lighter.  Some of what the things the project made me do may not sound fun, but learning about myself was something that I needed to do.

Ive always liked poetry, but this showed my how I write.  I discovered that I love free verse; I hate following other kinds of poems' restrictions.  I developed a love for word connotation (lame I know). When I can think of a good one, metaphors are my favorite.  Theses things have improved my writing all around and the way I speak.  I may not have cured cancer, or changed the world around me in anyway, but my 20x project changed my world.

I'm giving my speech this Friday at 7:15 in the morning.  I have to admit that I have written none of  my speech, zip, zero, nada.  I know great planning on my part, especially with the softball double headers I have all week.  i do, however know what idea I want to center my speech around.  What I learned from this project is that I've made a new friend.  Cliche, right?  The whole thing will support the idea that my poetry have been a (metaphorical) friend to me through out the past school year.

On that note I'm going to sign off my last blog post with the poem I wrote for my mom for Mother's Day:

Every time I've looked to the past
there you have always been,
and every time I would cast
away what you really mean.
You're the rock that keeps me grounded
to the little sanity in life.
It's you who keeps me surrounded
with the love that sets things right.
It's you I need to thank
for always being there.
It's you who is always frank,
telling me what I need to hear.
It's you I'll always love,
who will love me in return,
because a mother's love is high above
fragility, it cannot be overturn.

Thanks so much for a great year!


Sunday, April 19, 2015

A Change of Gear

Hey, its been a while. I've written two poems since I last posted. I know that doesn't seem like a lot, but those two poems are packed with enough emotion to be worth at least five of my other poems.  I had a few really rough weeks recently and I used my writing as an outlet for the turmoil I've been experiencing of late.  I'm not going to share my personal problems, but my Uncle had a stroke and I struggled more in school.  The first poem I wrote was a plain free verse titled Terror.  My second poem doesn't have a title because I can't place a finger on which emotion it expresses.

Earlier I mentioned publishing.  I realize that I will not be publishing anytime soon by any means.  That doesn't mean I won't in the future.  i just don't have enough material to actual make a book.  Right now I plan to continue to write poetry, adding on to the number of works I already have; a grand total of 19 so far.  The school year is coming to a close, so I need to focus my attention on the end of the year speech.  From here till I give the speech, this will be main focus in terms of the 20x project.  I've started to brainstorm some possible topics for my talk, but I have nothing concrete yet.  I will let you know as I progress.



Saturday, March 21, 2015

A Cheerful Heart

Hey, I don't have a lot to talk about this time. I know I know; when has she ever had not a lot to say? Anyway, I've been really busy the past two weeks with thing other than thin project.  however, I have continued working on the poem I mentioned last post. I'm still not finished, but this poem is going to take a while, it takes more thought.  I did write and finish another poem. This poem is based off of my personal bible verse. This verse is something I had to find for confirmation class, it is supposed to say something that I feel is important.  the poem itself has a A-B-A-B-C-B-C-B-D-B-D-B rhyme pattern. I'm not going to post this poem but I will sign off with the verse it is based off of, its from the King James Bible.

"A cheerful heart is a good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." -Proverbs 17:22

Thanks, till next time,


Sunday, March 8, 2015

Poe-ssibly Publishing

Hey, I finished editing the poems I talked about last post. I'll sign off with the shortest one. I also mentioned righting a gothic lit inspired piece. We recently read Edgar Allen Poe's piece "The Raven" in class. I started a story, in poem form, inspired by the famous piece. It isn't finished. Each stanza has      an a-b-c-b-b rhyme pattern. It is about a women who is left at the altar and her ghost's revenge upon the man who left her, and his family.  I've tried to incorporate tons of symbolism, like Poe did in his stories. I' not finished yet,  but it is a work in progress.

On another note, I said last time that I was considering self-publishing, once I do complete my book. I heard my english teacher talking to another student about self-publishing. He said that it is easier to self-publish through Amazon, and that it can be done for free. I looked briefly at the cite for publishing one's book on the kindle. I didn't dig super deep, but the process looked fairly simpler.  If I do end up self-publishing my book I will probably do it through Amazon.

On that positive note, I'd like to say adieu.


Tchh...Tchh...crash the waves
   upon the sandy shore line
     like a strong heart beat



Sunday, February 22, 2015

Long Term Planning

Hey, I've just gotten back from mid-winter break;  I was visiting family in Florida. I wrote a few short, fun poems, while I was gone. I want to add on to them; to improve them, to try to create some depth to the poems.  They were all inspired by the environment that Florida provided.  One is about the beach, one is about relaxation, and another is about the sun and air.  I'm not going to post any this year, because I want to work on them a little more.

I'm considering writing a poem about insanity/fear. I just finished reading Bag of Bones by Stephen King, and the story kinda freaked me out.  I think it would be a good pic to put in real emotion.  I was read about 530 pages of crazy in 3 days, so my brain is still trying to process the novel, and writing about it would help to understand it a bit better.

I've been thinking about the final product of this project.  I'm thinking about looking into self publishing.  I consider myself a realist; I'm not going to write a full book of awesome poetry by the end of the year, it will take more time than that.  I want to plan for later, for when I do write enough to actually have a whole book.  a friend of mine wrote his own book last year, and he looked into self publishing himself. I'll ask him about it and try to do some research on the topic in addition to writing my poems.

Till next time,


Sunday, February 8, 2015

Inspiration Issues

Hey, all. I need to warn you guys that I'm writing this post while operating on little sleep. I have no proper excuse, just that Pride and Prejudice is way more interesting than I ever thought it would be.  I'm a slightly slap happy right now, having just spent the last 5 hours being quiet at church, so it may see like I'm rambling today.

As you may have guessed, my life is pretty uneventful, so I'm having difficulties getting inspired on any topics at the moment. So, in order to actually write any decent poetry I've been trying to base my work off of different books I've read and/or shows I watch. i know, kinda lame, but I'm not just writing about the show. I try to put myself into the character's place. My poem's are about how i would feel if I were in that person's place, and going through all the crap they are going through.  it may seem unorthodox, but I'll only use this technique when I've got nothing else to base a poem off of.

This week has been one of those weeks in which there hasn't been anything eventful to inspire my poems. so I used the method i mentioned above.  I based my poem off of the anime Tokyo Ghoul.  It's about a college student named Kaneki, who is bitten and starts to turn into a ghoul. The show is about him trying to resist his ghoul side; trying to hang on to his humanity and to not eat people. As such, this poem is kinda dark, but when I wrote it I was full of feeling.  It is a free verse poem, like most of my other pieces.  I call it Struggle after the speaker's internal battle. It's kinda long, so I'm not going to post any of the poem. The next updated will be in about two weeks, after my midwinter break from school.


P.S. Happy Valentine's Day

Sunday, January 25, 2015

Confession Time

I know it's a half-assed excuse, but having had semester 1 finals the past week, I've only written one poem over the past two week. While I was studying for my exams my brain was fried, it was as if all my creative juices had sizzled away. Outside of my exams it has been a stressful time for my mother, she was writing her annual meeting address, as the Head Warden of our church. I've been trying to make it easier for her. Any free time I had was spent binding choral sheet music.  I had had six sets of   pieces I had promised to bind for my choir director.

Today, however, my mom gave her address. She cried, but I had never been prouder of her than at that moment. I know it sounds kinda a reversed situation, but she had worked so hard and so long for three years, that I started to tear up too. Now that all that stress has been lifted off our shoulders, I'm going to try to tap into the pride I had for my mother, using it as inspiration for a new poem this evening.

Now, time to talk about what I actually accomplished. The previous week, I had already started glancing over my notes for the American Lit. exam. Reading over all the stuff we had discussed about transcendentalism inspired me to write something about individuality.  As you may or may not know, R. W. Emerson said "...imitation is suicide...", and I completely concur.  I hate it when people go around trying to be something they are not. It is one thing to admire someone, but going out of your way to 'have the same purse' as some celebrity is just shallow, and boring.  I ended up writing a four stanza poem, each with four lines. Each stanza had an A-B-A-B rhyming pattern I call it The Fall.

Here are the first and final stanzas of my poem:

Imitation is beige;
bland and boring.
From age to age,
society is a lemming.

Beige has never been
the color for me.
It's one's final sin;
something I will never be.

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Happy 2015!!!

First and foremost, I'd like to wish you all a happy New Year.  It's been quite a while since my last post, about a month I think.  I have to say I'm really excited about what I wrote over my long Christmas break. I attempted to write a lot of poems, but I wrote two pieces that I am proud of.

I wrote a poem with a sort of new format. If you know what a found poem is, my poem is similar that. However, instead of mixing up words from an article, I used song lyrics. I call it…(drum roll please)…a Lyric Collage. This time, I combined a bunch of different lyrics from songs by Three Days Grace. i think it turned out nicely, if I do say so myself.

This past Sunday, I was in choir rehearsal, and I just happen to peek outside through the window. There was the fluffiest, torrent of snow swarming the sky. I knew I was going to have to write something about the snow. When I actually started to write the poem, I was listening to the sound track to one of the shows I follow. This one song came on, and I find it almost tragically beautiful. (Here is the link to the song ) I was really feeling that song at the moment ( I'm not really sure why) so I just played it the whole time I was writing the poem. The mood of the song affected how i had view the snow flurries earlier.  My piece came out more somber than I had originally intended, but I think that was for the best. My piece is more of a collection of haikus that make up a larger story. I wrote 8 haikus within my overall piece. So far, I've just called it "Snow", but I want to brainstorm a little bit more inventive title for it.

This past Friday, I was yet again writing poetry while listening to the song linked above. This time I wrote a poem inspired by just the feeling that listening to that song gave me, not the snow. I think the piece is nice, but it needs a final line to sum it all up. I think that sadness is the most difficult emotion to express with words. No matter how you put it, it doesn't quite match how you feel. Its this kind of pull, and ache right where your diaphragm is, behind the bottom of your lungs' center And I'm not sure how to really say what this song makes me feel, but I think my poem came closer than before.

I'd thought I'd sign off with the first 3 haikus of my new poem, "Snow."

Blanketing the ground
shimmering in the moon light
like stars in from the sky

And yet it is so cold
it seeps deep into one's bones
making the heart chill

Flurries fill the sky
pieces of heaven floating
like angels' feathers 

Happy New Years again, wishing you all the best,